5D Chess With Multiverse Time Travel sure is 5D chess with multiverse time travel, yep

I’m sure you, a genius much like myself, have often looked at chess and thought “This is an idiot’s game for babies, fools, and foolish baby idiots.” I’m sure you, a genius much like myself, will therefore be thrilled to see the launch of 5D Chess With Multiverse Time Travel. And you, a genius much like myself, will be only too keen to play chess across extra “spatial, temporal, and parallel dimensions”. You, a genius much like myself, certainly will not read the marketing boast “It’s the first ever chess variant with multiverse time travel!” and groan OH GOD HELP.

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